Our girls' birthdays are two weeks apart and this year we are throwing a party. Unusual because there are 32 people in our combined families - yes, that's just grandparents, one great-grandma, siblings, spouses and grandkids - and the last few years we have just had the grandparents over for dinner. This year we were crazy enought to throw an actual party.

The girls are really excited, they see most of their cousins pretty routinely and it's always fun to get everyone together. We own a total of 10 chairs and a couch so the party will be at one of the city parks. I think this will work out well, plenty of space and the grandkids can play on the playground equipment. We have invited everyone for lunch and cake though we're not exactly sure what's on the menu. Katie & Gretchen picked out hula paper plates and napkins which I though was hilarious given their cake demands.

Two things are definitely set - one 2 layer devils food cake with a Batgirl symbol, and one 9x13 white cake with a Supergirl symbol. This fascination with comics is not my fault. I'm not really sure that I want to encourage it with the cakes but it appears that I have no choice - no flowers this year, no hot pink cupcakes, not even a green Incredible Hulk chocolate chip cake.

Now the research starts, finding a good picture of each symbol, figuring out how the heck to map them out on the cakes. Batgirl seems pretty straightforward, Supergirl, not so much. I did just learn something from www.wilton.com - for black frosting start with chocolate frosting so you use less of the icing coloring and don't get a gross aftertaste. I'll make sure to post pictures of the finished product, even if they don't turn out that great.

Something has been not right with the universe lately. Natural and man-made disasters seem to pop up on a weekly basis. Maybe one more earthquake or volcanic eruption will provide a jump start to get everything back on track. Maybe this spring rain we have had more than enough of lately will wash everything clean, let us all start anew.

If there is anything to learn from the local, national, and family events of late it is that we should all be taking a little more time, making a little more effort. Slow down. Reflect. Spend meaningful time with your children, your spouses, your family and friends. Those e-mails and the stack of research will be there waiting for me at work tomorrow – they are tragedy proof.

Before going to bed at night I wander around the house, look out the windows, check the locks, fold the last of the laundry, set the coffee pot for the morning, give it all a good once-over before turning out the lights. Somehow I stopped walking into the girls’ rooms to check on them before going to bed, started to just peek in from the doorways. I’m not sure why, maybe I felt too busy, didn’t want to bother them, thought they were too grown up.

Don’t get me wrong, we have an elaborate bed-time ritual complete with face washing, teeth brushing, hair brushing, bed straightening, room pick-up, closing curtains, lights off, lamps on, one book to Gretchen, a quick chat with Katie, a hug and kiss from both.

This is the routine for them, checking on the girls before I went to bed was just for me. I know they are in their beds, I can see them from the doorway; see them when I reach in to turn off the lamp. At some point I got out of the habit of reaching out to touch them, brush the hair from their faces, pick up the bear that lost its spot on the bed, take in the beauty of a sleeping child.

A couple of nights ago I broke the habit of not and walked into Katie’s room to check on her, brushed the hair back from her face with my hand and pulled the blankets up a bit. Gretchen was hanging halfway off of on her bed. I picked up her tiny sleeping body and put her back in the middle of the bed, pulling up the blankets, tucking her in again. How did I ever make it through the night without checking on them?

Recent recipe discussion with my Mother

Sitting down at my parent's dinner table.

Me: "When I make this it never turns out right."
Mom: "You must not be following the recipe."
Me: "Well no, because the recipe calls for diced tomatoes and I know that you use sauce and it calls for the rice to be added and cooked in the sauce not separately like you do since Dad won't eat rice."
Mom: "It doesn't call for diced tomatoes."
Me: "Yeah, I just read it the other night, I swear it says diced tomatoes, and green peppers and onions. It was really chunky when I made it."
Mom: "I'm sure it says sauce."

At this point, Mom gets up from the table mid-meal to retreive her copy of the same old cookbook we all have to reveiw for my obvious errors.

Mom: "Well, I guess it does call for diced tomatoes. ... And, well I don't add much for green peppers 'cause your Dad doesn't really like them in this, and well I switched from onions to the dehydrated ones 'cause you don't like onions. ... Oh, and I always made 'this recipe' with 2 pounds of ground beef 'cause there were so many of us."

Western Hash from the cookbook v. how Mom really makes it
1 pound ground beef v. 2 pounds ground beef (used to be 2 pounds when the kids all lived at home, now it's usually 1)
3 1/2 c. tomatoes v. 12-16 oz. Hunt's tomato sauce
1 c. chopped pepper v. 1/4 c. very finely chopped green pepper
1/2. chopped onion v. 2 T. dried minced onion
1/2 c. uncooked rice v. 2 cups rice cooked separately and one baked potato for Dad
The last four ingredients are actually the same: 1/2 t. salt, 1/2 t. basil, dash pepper, 1/2 pound Velveeta. And the directions - brown beef, drain fat, add rest of ingredients execept cheese and simmer for 25 minutes, top with cheese and heat until melted. Serve on top of rice or baked potato.

Mom: "Well I guess I have made a few changes over the years."
Me: "Yeah, I guess so."

We could have similar discussions on lasagne, meatballs, vegetable beef soup, spaghetti sauce, and numerous other recipes.